Being Invisible

Why is it, when someone comes to you with a question and you give them the answer that they are looking for, they feel the need to go to someone else, get the same damn answer, then decide that "oh ok, I guess it's the right answer after all!" GAHHHHH!!!! Then why ask me the question in the first place??? This seems to be the theme of the week and it's only Monday! So, why did I title this blog being invisible? Just how I feel today.... I was supposed to meet a dear friend yesterday for lunch, since I was on his end of town and called and left a message Friday on my way out of town, called Saturday to let him know what time I was leaving on Sunday and then when I was 18 miles away, giving him plenty of time to meet me. Did he even bother to give a curiosity call? No, did he bother to call me today? No. So I have to admit I was childish and left a rather rude message on his voice mail. Why? Because I could have met some friends who'd invited me to join them, instead, I kept on driving home with my disappointed daughter who not only missed lunch with her favorite uncle, but also got cheated out of shopping because we were supposed to "meet him." Aggravation has now spilled over into Monday, since I was also "promised" a belated birthday lunch and an afternoon adventure. How did I spend it? Cleaning while those that had assured me that we would spend time together went out together and left be behind...with what??? Yet another I.O.U for lunch and my birthday....Mind you my birthday was almost three weeks ago and this lunch and shopping thing, when it's promised, seems to never get filled. I would probably cash in a good 4 or 5 days like this. So being Invisible seems to be the theme this week and like I had metioned earlier, it's only monday. Annoyed, hurt and Invisible. So thank you for skipping our lunch date, for asking for my advice then thinking I was wrong, only to find out I was right, and thank you for forgetting my birthday...yet again.....

The little things.....

I'm not a materialistic person, never have been probably never will be. I don't follow fashions or fads, hair trends or makeup. I have an addiction to good coffee (actually I will drink any coffee.) I have a deep appreciation for a good book, one that will keep me in suspense or one that will keep me up until two in the morning, because I can't put it down. A good manicure in a crazy color, one that will make you smile anytime that you look at your fingers. As silly as it sounds, people tend to over look those simple things or take them for granted. So stop for a moment, take a breath and brew up a cup of coffee. Make a list of the little things that make you happy and do one each day. Maybe read that book until two in the morning, or have that cookie, or paint your nails green....just do it and enjoy.

A New Project is Taking Shape

Old man winter has not been my friend. Living in the Midwest where snow and ice is an every day part of December can be a royal pain in the bum! Since we have spent many long snowy days indoors, I have turned to other creative outlets and taken on the challenge that a dear friend and author had presented. While reading an article a while back I was challenged to "write" my ideas down and write a book. Ok, now those of you that know me know that I not only work full time but have three kids of my own. But....that dare to take those few characters that had been forming in the back of my mind and put them on paper became tempting. So I started to give form to the voices in my head. (ok, I know what your thinking, but any writer has voices in their head.....and sometimes those voices have good ideas.) So, in blogs to come, I plan on introducing a few of those characters to my readers and hopefully a chapter or two...so stay tuned kiddies.

A new view for the New Year

I have managed to actually miss blogging for the majority of January, rather I have spent it people watching, which is becoming a new favorite past time for me. Now, you'll have to take into consideration that understanding the behavior of the human psyche is part of what I do for a living, without going into detail in what it is that I do. The other reason I enjoy it, well it's often better than cable television! I'm not a sorority girl, not a huge social butterfly, I never have been and let's face it kiddies I never will be. I have a comfortable group of friends that I prefer to socialize with and these are the people that know that even though I love them to death, my children are the most important thing in my life!!!
So, this years ramblings will delve into a whole new and additional blog. For the handful of silent followers that I have here, I will continue life in the real world, But I want to take my people watching to a new level and actually keep a blog on what makes people tick. SO coming soon will be a new addition, the title is still in the works, but the focus will be...well people.
So stay tuned!!!

Holy Crow, the school actually says Merry Christmas!

"Merry Christmas." That was the greeting that reached me today in the school lot as I dropped of my little man. Now, we've recently moved and my children are new to their respective schools this year. The old district that we were in, happened to be very "politically correct." It was always happy holidays, there were no Christmas parties, but holiday celebrations. Menorahs, Kwanzaa candles, Christmas trees, stockings and observance if Ramadan. Now, kids were discouraged from saying Merry Christmas, even though the schools were on CHRISTMAS vacation. My children were expected to swallow the force fed fact that they were to respect other cultures and religions while their own personal beliefs were to remain squashed and quiet. Now I have heard that it would be unchristian of my and of my offspring of they were not accepting of others. Though I believe that that there is a difference between acceptance and disrespect. If you expect me to respect your beliefs, then don't disrespect mine!!!

Now back to my moment of Holy Crow. We moved to a smaller community, actually we moved to farm ville. Not that this is a bad thing, the people in our new community are very friendly, and very accepting. They say Merry Christmas and my little man is having a Christmas party!!! Not a holiday party, not a multicultural holiday celebration, but an honest to goodness Christmas party. People here don't take offense to you wishing them Merry Christmas. This includes the staff at the schools, the shops, the restaurants. Christianity is still alive and well here on Earth.

a reading from the "book of plasma."

So the pertinent question of the day: "How many days until Christmas?" This is asked by my hazel eyed little man, who is of the ripe old age of seven. He is the absolute incarnate of Christmas wonder, his countdown begins in October and he waits with patience that would rival that of the saints in heaven above for December 1st. Why December 1st? Ahhh, well this is when he begins his own official countdown to what he considers the best holiday on the planet. Now my little man has two older siblings, both in middle school, one teetering the belief of the man in the red suit and one teen age sibling who has not believed in santa since the 4th grade. Now I would much rather wrap things and place them under the tree rather than stuff packages in every single unused crevice that I can find. Yet, the absolute amazement that this little guy brings to the holidays is amazing. His resounding joy for the holiday fills the house with his multiple choruses of jingle bells, Rudolph, frosty, and the 12 days of Christmas, he can be heard in the upstairs bathroom belting out the holiday top twenty at the top of his little lungs, leaving the rest of the house in fits of hysterical laughter. (he prefers this room due to the echo effect that the large room provides) The addition of the traditional chocolate filled advent calendar has added some interesting moments. For those not familiar with the advent calendar, it's a cardboard calendar with 24 little doors, behind each door is a small treat, this is to "countdown the days until the holiday." The one we have at home has small chocolates and on the door are a small bible reading. So, my little man takes his turn reading from the book of Psalms. He concludes this by saying "this is from the book of plasma."

Frosty, Jingle Bells, Rudolph, cookies, chocolate, trees, candy canes and now readings from the book of plasma....ahhh another christmas memory....thank you little man.

so how much does one have to pay it forward in order to feel better???

So....I have noticed an interesting trend in people this holiday season....the amazing trend of I have been so selfish that I MUST do something nice for humanity, that I MUST pay it forward.....News flash folks, atonement does not happen when you place that loose change in the red kettle, or when you decided that you should cut back since you have had a cut in pay, when last few years you spent every extra dime that you had or did not have in a gluttonous shopping spree or when you mail a few Christmas cards to soldiers, when last year you could have cared less. These two sins are referenced in Charles Dickens story "A Christmas Carol"...The spirit finally reveals to Scrooge two emaciated children, subhuman in appearance and loathsome to behold, clinging to his robes, and names the boy as Ignorance and the girl as Want. The spirit warns Scrooge, "Beware them both, and all of their degree, but most of all beware this boy, for on his brow I see that written which is Doom, unless the writing be erased."
Ok why the reference you ask, well dear bloggers, Ignorance and Want seem to be a theme that I have watched all year this year. Through the circle of individuals that I have or had considered to be my friend....yet, no matter the level of giving that they have received from me, whether it be in assistance, a listening ear or monetary flow, I have seen the same two children that appeared under that ghosts robes....ignorance and want....people wanting more and more and me being ignorant enough to believe that they were honest in their intention of being a friend. That when they realized that there was nothing else to be had that they have moved onto bigger and better people. Remember this quote kids..."water finds it's own level."
So in a way this blog is a warped dedication to those out there who used what they could and have moved on and are now trying desperately to grasp at straws to make yourselves feel better, the one thing is, I won't name names, so please don't ask....you know who you are....and fyi.....there is no atonement for ignorance and want....no matter how hard you try....the best thing you can do is offer an apology to the person...who's feelings you stepped on....and hope that atonement would be offered in the form of them accepting your apology.